Economic systems explained through the medium of cows

[X5Sport]

[size=99px]Economic systems explained through the medium of cows[/size]

SOCIALISM

You have 2 cows. You give one to your neighbour.

COMMUNISM

You have 2 cows. The State takes both and gives you some milk.

FASCISM

You have 2 cows. The State takes both and sells you some milk.

EUROPEAN UNION

You have 2 cows. The State takes both, shoots one, milks the other, and then throws the milk away.

TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM

You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull.
Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows.
You sell them and retire on the income.

AMERICAN CORPORATISM

You have two cows.
You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows.
Later, you hire a consultant to analyse why the cow has dropped dead.

BANKING VENTURE CAPITALISM

You have two cows.
You sell three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened by your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute debt/equity swap with an associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax exemption for five cows.
The milk rights of the six cows are transferred via an intermediary to a Cayman Island Company secretly owned by the majority shareholder who sells the rights to all seven cows back to your listed company.
The annual report says the company owns eight cows, with an option on one more.
The audited accounts make no mention of the cows on the balance sheet
You keep paying for milk but never get any

FRENCH CORPORATISM

You have two cows.
You go on strike, organize a riot, and block the roads, because you want three cows.

JAPANESE CORPORATISM

You have two cows.
You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk.
You then create a clever cow cartoon image called `Cowkimon´ and market it worldwide.

GERMAN CORPORATISM

You have two cows.
You re-engineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk themselves.

ITALIAN CORPORATISM

You have two cows, but you don´t know where they are. You decide to have lunch.

SWISS CORPORATISM

You have 5000 cows. None of them belong to you. You charge the owners for storing them.

CHINESE CORPORATISM

You have two cows.
You have 300 people milking them.
You claim that you have full employment, and high bovine productivity.
You arrest the newsman who reported the real situation.

INDIAN CORPORATISM

You have two cows. You worship them.

BRITISH CORPORATISM

You have two cows. Both are mad!!

[petert]

Sublime!

[amacman]

I found out the difference between PMT & CJD .


one is mad cow disease and the other is an agricultural problem .


Ah`ll get ma Harris tweed jacket , ma bagpipes an ma collie dug then .

[AW8]

[quote=""X5Sport""][size=99px]Economic systems explained through the medium of cows[/size]

SOCIALISM

You have 2 cows. You give one to your neighbour.

COMMUNISM

You have 2 cows. The State takes both and gives you some milk.

FASCISM

You have 2 cows. The State takes both and sells you some milk.

EUROPEAN UNION

You have 2 cows. The State takes both, shoots one, milks the other, and then throws the milk away.

TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM

You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull.
Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows.
You sell them and retire on the income.

AMERICAN CORPORATISM

You have two cows.
You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows.
Later, you hire a consultant to analyse why the cow has dropped dead.

BANKING VENTURE CAPITALISM

You have two cows.
You sell three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened by your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute debt/equity swap with an associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax exemption for five cows.
The milk rights of the six cows are transferred via an intermediary to a Cayman Island Company secretly owned by the majority shareholder who sells the rights to all seven cows back to your listed company.
The annual report says the company owns eight cows, with an option on one more.
The audited accounts make no mention of the cows on the balance sheet
You keep paying for milk but never get any

FRENCH CORPORATISM

You have two cows.
You go on strike, organize a riot, and block the roads, because you want three cows.

JAPANESE CORPORATISM

You have two cows.
You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk.
You then create a clever cow cartoon image called `Cowkimon´ and market it worldwide.

GERMAN CORPORATISM

You have two cows.
You re-engineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk themselves.

ITALIAN CORPORATISM

You have two cows, but you don´t know where they are. You decide to have lunch.

SWISS CORPORATISM

You have 5000 cows. None of them belong to you. You charge the owners for storing them.

CHINESE CORPORATISM

You have two cows.
You have 300 people milking them.
You claim that you have full employment, and high bovine productivity.
You arrest the newsman who reported the real situation.

INDIAN CORPORATISM

You have two cows. You worship them.

BRITISH CORPORATISM

You have two cows. Both are mad!![/quote]


Very good - Made me chuckle

[AW8]

[quote=""X5Sport""][size=99px]Economic systems explained through the medium of cows[/size]..............................................................................................................................................[/quote]


Very good - Made me chuckle