You kant beet a good edukashun....

[X5Sport]

The Arts
In last year’s Christmas concert, Linzi played the main prat. I played one of the smaller prats and I would like to have a bigger prat this year.

Geography
The closest town to France is Dover. You can get to France on a train or you can get a fairy.
In geography we learned that countries with sea around them are islands, and ones without are incontinents.
In Scandinavia, the Danish people come from Denmark, the Norwegians come from Norway, and the Lapdancers come from Lapland.

Maths
I would like to be an accountant but you have to know a lot about moths.
The total is when you add up all the numbers and a remainder is an animal that pulls Santa on his sleigh.
If it is less that 90 degrees the it is a cute angle.

History
In wartime children who live in big cities like Liverpool had to be evaporated, because it was safer in the country.
Sir Walter Raleigh circumcised the world with a big clipper.
Joan of Arc met her end. She was burnt as a steak.
Sometimes in the war they take prisoners and keep them as ostriges until the war is over. Some prisoners end up in constipation camps.

Natural History
Crabs and creatures like them belong a family of crushed Asians.

Religious Studies
If you marry two people you are a pigamist. But Morons are allowed to do this.
I asked my Mum why we say 'old men' at the end of prayers at school. I don’t know any old men apart from my Grandpa.

Science
Helicopters are cleverer than planes. Not only can they fly through the air, they can also hoover.

Holidays
On our activity holiday Dad wanted to ride on the hores, but Mum said they were too expensive

[pvr]