Renaming the UK....

[X5Sport]

A Poem: Renaming the UK. (They are renaming the UK on 1st January 2014)

Daftland

We live in a country called Daftland
The England we knew is no more
Where sensible people do ludicrous things
Or risk breaking some Daftland law.

In Daftland we've police dogs with muzzles
Less the villain has cause to complain
And to steal from a shop and say 'sorry'
Means your free with no stain to your name.

You had better leave lights on in buildings
When you lock up and go home at night
'cause the burglars might hurt themselves entering
And there's no way you'll be in the right.

When speaking be wary in Daftland
As some terms that you've used all your life
Now have connotations unintended
And you'll end up in all sorts of strife.

We elect politicians in Daftland
To give us the laws of the land
Yet eight laws in ten now come from abroad
The whole thing has got out of hand.

The borders are open in Daftland
And of migrants there's no keeping track
Just a few of the thousands illegally here
Will ever be caught and sent back.

The exception to this is the hero
Who fought for this land in the war
He's old and he's sick, he might cost us a bit
So he's not welcome here any more.

When the history is written of Daftland
Historians may just recall
That the craziest people in Daftland
Were the public who put up with it all.

****************************************
Editors Notes.....
Work harder; millions on benefits depend on your taxes!

Save the Earth... it's the only planet with chocolate!!!!!

“Foreign aid is taking money from the poor people of a rich country and
giving it to the rich people of a poor country.”

[shadrack]

particularily like the notes at the bottom!

[Mars]

Getting even more daft by the day!

[Reusch]

Great post and true.

[petert]

Yep - that very last editors note is what really frustrates me.
It's not the donating part at all...
Peter T

[pvr]

Yes, those notes ...

[Smeeagain]

You could move to Scotland and leave Daftland behind ....... 

[X5Sport]

I think we need to build a fence between England & Wales and move to the western side of it.....and put better barriers across the Severn Bridges to keep us safe in Wales.

That way the Scots can keep Nicola, the English Jeremy and the Irish are a long swim away.

[Mars]

More sheep per square mile than anywhere else  :spiteful:

[Mars]

I wish PVR would keep his dog under control he's popping up all over the place 

[X5Sport]

[quote="Mars"]
More sheep per square mile than anywhere else  :spiteful:
[/quote]

Absolutely....... :spiteful:

[Mars]

I'll treat you to a pair of velcro gloves like the ones I bought 535dboy. 

[X5Sport]

Can I have the wellies too?  It's where the back legs go..... O:-)

[Mars]

[quote="X5Sport"]
Can I have the wellies too?  It's where the back legs go..... O:-)
[/quote]

You've given this a lot of thought, haven't you?!

:nono:
)

[X5Sport]

Some of my (wife's) family hail from over Offa's Dyke!